Archive | February, 2012

Terms of Endearment

29 Feb

Terms of Endearment

How do you address your spouse? Or, for those dating, how do you address your romantic interest? How soon into a relationship do you start giving each other pet names or nicknames?

An ex-boyfriend used to call me ‘Sexy’. It used to turn me all warm inside. I thought this was our special word and that he truly thought me sexy. It was only recently that I came across, by chance on Facebook, the fact that he uses this term with any and every woman he knows.

Besides ‘Dear’ or graduating when you feel emotionally closer to each other to ‘Dearest’ and ‘Darling’, what else do you use? How about ‘Sweetheart’? ‘Honey’? ‘Baby’? ‘Love’?

It goes without saying that what term you use and when you use it does reflect on how you are feeling towards your lover at that time.

I had a tiff with my dearest the other day over something through no fault of his. He asked if I still loved him. I retorted, “Yes, but I am angry right now.”

I didn’t use any of cute or creative pet names we had brainstormed previously. They are adorable too. Next time, I am going to try it. I’d yell out ‘Dearest’ if I need to — to remind him of my love which doesn’t change even if I am angry.


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Elderly Couple of 62 Years plays piano

28 Feb

An elderly couple walked into the lobby of the Mayo Clinic for a checkup and spotted a piano. They’ve been married for 62 years and he’ll be 90 this year. Check out this impromptu performance. We are only as old as we feel, it’s all attitude. Enjoy!


Video: The Wife Song

27 Feb

Funny! The Wife Song by Tim Hawkins

Your Skin Can Hear

26 Feb

Your Skin Can Hear

We not only hear with our ears, but also through our skin, according to a new study.

The finding, based on experiments in which participants listened to certain syllables while puffs of air hit their skin, suggests our brains take in and integrate information from various senses to build a picture of our surroundings.

Along with other recent work, the research flips the traditional view of how we perceive the world on its head.

“[That's] very different from the more traditional ideas, based on the fact that we have eyes so we think of ourselves as seeing visible information, and we have ears so we think of ourselves as hearing auditory information. That’s a little bit misleading,” study researcher Bryan Gick of the University of British Columbia, Vancouver, told LiveScience.

“A more likely explanation is that we have brains that perceive rather than we have eyes that see and ears that hear.”

With such abilities, Gick views humans as “whole-body perceiving machines.”

What role does this new information relate to lovemaking? Experiment and have fun doing so.

Kissing: The Fun and Creative Way

25 Feb

Have you ever wondered if there are varieties in kissing? Well, of course there are. All you need is the willingness to explore the possibilities and you will definitely find yourself enjoying new, fun, and flirty kisses with your partner.

Enjoy showing your affection to your partner by planting these creative kisses:

  • Candy Kiss – This kiss consists of passing a candy between each other’s mouth from time to time. Aside from candies, you can use mints or gums or anything that dissolves fast. Just make sure not to chew something that can make you choke.
  • Upside-Down Kiss – As portrayed in the movie Spider-Man, the upside down kiss is another fun way to flirt with your beau. To perform an upside-down kiss doesn’t mean that you literally reenact the movie scene, it can happen anywhere. It is easily done even if the other person is just lying down or sitting on a comfortable couch.
  • The French Kiss – Perhaps, French Kissing, which is otherwise known as “Tongue Kissing”, is the most common way to kiss. Adding tongue action definitely heightens the emotion. While it is popular, it takes years of practice to reach perfection with this kiss.
  • Earlobe Kiss – If you want to turn your lover on, the Earlobe Kiss will surely do the trick. However, you have to make sure that the ears are clean before performing this kiss. Otherwise, you’ll end up disgusted as you ingest your partner’s ear wax.
  • Nip Kissing – If French Kissing is a whole lot of fun, you should try Nip Kissing. A Nip Kiss involves biting your partner’s lips. Ensure that the biting is done gently, otherwise it will be painful and the passion is ruined.

Kissing is always pleasurable and it brings out the best and deepest sensation in a person. Don’t hesitate to research and try something new. Who knows, maybe you’ll turn out to be a great kisser after all.

This article first appeared on, a micro site belonging to Eros Coaching.


Sacred Sex

24 Feb

In the eyes of most religions, sex and spirituality are like oil and water – they just don’t belong together. This belief has become so widespread that many think that celibacy is essential to evolve spiritually. We have been conditioned to view sex as something which is dirty. Many of us suffer from guilt that stems from engaging or even fantasising about the act of ecstatic communion with our beloved. How twisted is that?

Sexual energy was used to promote physical, emotional and spiritual development in many ancient cultures like India, Tibet and China. This precious knowledge was suppressed by organised religion as a way of control and replaced by the notion that ‘Sex is Evil’. As a result, we have a sexually confused society which is constantly at conflict with itself.

Sexual energy is the primal and creative energy of the universe. All things that are alive come from sexual energy. Maithunam paramam tatvam, shrushti stithi anya karanam (Coitus is the ultimate principle behind creation, preservation and destruction of the Universe), said Lord Shiva in the Kailas Tantra.

In animals and other life forms, sexual energy expresses itself as biological creativity. In humans, sexual energy can be creative at all levels — physical, emotional and spiritual. Sexual energy is at work in any situation where we feel creative, attraction, arousal, awakening, alertness, passion, interest, inspiration, excitement or enthusiasm.

It is time we liberate our sexuality from the chains of guilt, shame and repression to allow it to find full expression as a natural, healthy and sacred part of life. Sex can be a way of magnifying love throughout your body and to connect hearts together in the infinite radiance of the Source. Sex can be a doorway to greater love – an avenue to deeper surrender to the divine.

Sexuality expert, Dr Gina Ogden discovered that 83% of respondents reported that sexuality connects them with a Higher Power when asked what qualities sexuality involves in their lives. Almost half said that they experienced God at the moment of sexual ecstasy (which may or may not mean orgasm).

Sacred sex does not mean that you must have lots and lots of sex to get enlightened. It is about the ‘quality’ of sex. David Deida eloquently summarises it in his book ‘The Enlightened Sex Manual’, “Good artists are skilled but great artists convey an immense depth of feeling through their expertise. A good lover knows how to make the body sing but a great lover, a superior lover, evokes a vast choir of bliss. A good orgasm is satisfying but a great orgasm can be a revelation of your deepest being, unfolding the bright truth of who you are in ecstatic communion with your lover.”

Since sex is merely another activity in our daily life, it reflects our state of being. Most of us tend to bring our emotional baggage to bed: stress from work, our need to be reassured that we are loved, our history of failed relationships and sexual failure. It is impossible to have great sex unless we unload ourselves and travel light.

Our natural state is love until we get inhibited by fear. The superior lover is one who practices authentic loving as a lifestyle instead of stopping short and staying in a comfortable cage of familiar habits fed by fear. Conscious sex involves technical exercises to realign the body’s energy, clear communication, and a willingness to be vulnerable. True surrender requires an unguarded heart.

As we shine the light on all aspects of our sexuality, every challenge is seen as an opportunity to stretch open and embrace life. We have the ability to transform the haphazard flow of stimulated genital energy into a profound depth of embodied openness by undoing the kinks in our bodies and emotions.

Our bittersweet sex life is a mirror of our dilemma between our deep desire to be open and our tight grip on the ego for safety. In sex, we desire to lose ourselves completely in overwhelming bodily pleasure but we also fear this loss of control. The inability to have an orgasm is due to the fear of losing control. We need to get out of our heads and into our bodies. For a really deep orgasm, a woman must be totally comfortable with herself sexually – at ease with her body, her ever-changing emotions, as well as her vocal and bodily expressions of pleasures.

Sometimes, we hold back the spontaneous expression of love flowing through our bodies. We do this primarily by suppressing our breath. Our bellies constrict, we close our hearts and tie ourselves in knots. In order to have conscious sex, we must learn to use the breath to circulate energy throughout the body.

You can awaken your nervous system by being aware of an energy pathway that runs from your perineum (area between the genitals and the anus) up your spine, through your head and down the front of the body back to the perineum. With practice, you can achieve full union with your partner when all the channels are clear and merge as a single force of love.

“True intimacy is union between flesh and flesh, between subtle body and subtle body, between soul and soul. Sexual energy is sacred energy. When we have restored the sexual experience to the realm of the sacred, our world will be chaste and divine, holy and healed,” says Deepak Chopra.

May we all have the courage to live pleasurably and joyfully as we explore the mysteriously luscious terrain of sex!

Chim Li Yen is co-founder of The Violet Flame Holistic Shop and Therapy Centre, Bangsar. Check out the website at

Quote by John Lennon

23 Feb

Quote by John Lennon

“It matters not
Who you love
Where you love
Why you love
When you love
Or how you love
It matters only that you love.”

John Lennon

John Winston Ono Lennon, MBE (9 October 1940 – 8 December 1980) was an English singer-songwriter who rose to worldwide fame as one of the founding members of The Beatles, and together with Paul McCartney formed one of the most successful songwriting partnerships of the 20th century.

Sesame Street Wisdom: What is Marriage?

22 Feb

Sesame Street Wisdom: What is Marriage?

What is marriage?

Grover and Jesse discuss what marriage is.


Calendar: Happiness Now

22 Feb

Calendar: Happiness Now

Product Description:

In this perpetual flip calendar that you can use year after year, Robert Holden, Ph.D., offers rich insights and valuable wisdom to help you release the power of happiness in you. Through his pioneering work with The Happiness Project, Holden has discovered indispensable keys to true self-acceptance, everyday abundance, loving relationships, inner success, and lasting joy. Each day presents a thought-provoking observation or practical exercise to help you stop chasing happiness and truly experience it—starting NOW!

4-Color Perpetual Flip Calendar!

About the Author

Robert Holden, Ph.D., is the Director of The Happiness Project and Success Intelligence. His innovative work on happiness and success has been featured on Oprah and in two major BBC-TV documentaries, The Happiness Formula and How to Be Happy, shown in 16 countries to more than 30 million television viewers. He’s the author of ten best-selling books, including Success Intelligence, Shift Happens, Happiness Now! and Be Happy! Website:

More about Hay House here. Order this here!

Eros for Couples

22 Feb

Eros for Couples

This e-book is a compilation of past work I wrote during the course of 2009 and 2010. I decided to do so because I have found myself repeatedly answering the same issues, topics and questions only in different angles and ways. This e-book tackles how to meaningfullyincrease sexual intimacy, trust and rekindle passion in people’s lives.

You will

  • Receive 12 essays on sex and sexuality for couples in one handy booklet!
  • Receive practical tips on how to keep erotic passion going!
  • Gain a better idea of how to approach the taboo subject of communicating about sex!

Purchase Eros for Couples by Eros Coaching for just S$19.90 today!

View the other ebooks by Eros Coaching here!